Of *course* it's for tomorrow

I finally picked a monologue for my audition workshop in tomorrow's acting class. It's not like I've had lots of time to think about it (although, for the longest time I was going to perform something I wrote myself), and I really don't have the time to memorize it tonight, either. It's relatively short and simple, I'm just concerned that I'll fall apart at the end when I'm....well, fall apart, but in a vastly different way. The end lines just scream for me to cry (and I can feel tears start to gather), but I don't know that I'll actually manage to burst into tears like I should. I need to practice, but I feel awkward with Debbie just sitting there [watching TV, but I didn't need to say that, I'm sure it was implied] and me watching ever sad movie on my computer in an effort to figure out exactly how I physically cry. In theory--at least, I hope--once I know exactly how I start to cry (does my nose crinkle up? Do I start to heave a little?), I can mimic the same motions and bring out tears. I think that's how my textbook explained it. I dunno. No matter what I do right now, I *still* might become nervous tomorrow and screw everything up.

I have such confidence in myself--it's just amazing. *sigh*